Thursday, February 5, 2009

Getting Unstuck

A few people this week have lamented about how stuck they feel and how they just don't know how to get unstuck. All are pretty conscious human beings, who understand the power of thought, the Law of Attraction, the use of affirmations. They use these and other tools, and are quite frustrated that they are not moving forward yet. I point out the progress I have seen to little avail. The progress is not manifesting externally or at least not fast enough. More important, they feel stuck. And so that is where they are: stuck.

One conversation today eventually revealed that the person is protecting something through her stuck-ness. While we talked, she wrote the question "what am I protecting?" at the same time as I told her I visualized a block of ice with something frozen inside, like that cave man in the Swiss Alps who was revealed when the glacier receded. The conversation was delicate. We were picking away at the surrounding defenses through observations and questions and emotions and answers, and together arrived at the same place: there is something old and precious literally stuck in the ice that is somewhere inside her subconscious or soul or energy field or somewhere like that.

This dear woman used her words and brains and talents and job search efforts almost as hay or straw to insulate the block of ice and prevent anyone from seeing it as well as protect it from melting. Today, she made huge, courageous progress by being willing to peek behind the straw and to take some of it away so I could see the ice. What's inside remains indistinct.

Yet, like the cave man revealed by the warmth of the sun, what's inside will gradually come to light. She didn't consciously know that this was there. Now that she does, there's an opening for her to do some work on freeing herself from the stuckness. Because, in reality, she is trapped inside that block of ice along with whatever it is she's protecting. I believe that as long as a part of us is inaccessible, it will be difficult to fully realize our goals and dreams.

Luckily, life reveals those challenges to us by presenting situations in which we feel trapped or stuck. It's sort of like having a giant magnet outside us very powerfully attracting whatever it is that is hidden deep inside. Until I pass over or by that magnet, I'm not aware that I have anything within that will stop me. I can demagnetize it by bringing it into the open, into the light, and either discarding it or transmuting it into something so fundamentally different that the attraction is gone. I am no longer stuck, I am free to move on.

My coaches (yes, I have two now) and my experience with getting unstuck all suggest that if you're stuck where you are now and see no way out, it may be time for work on emotions and on the subconscious level. Some tools I've used to help myself get unstuck are stream-of-consciousness writing, meditation, non-dominant hand writing, dream work, and change of scenery.

For my stuck friend, I suggested she write about the block of ice. Writing stream-of-consciousness - meaning whatever comes into your mind, you write down - consider these questions: What size is it, shape? What does it look like? What does she see inside it? Color, shape, size? What might it be? What might it be saying? Why is it inside the ice? How long has it been there? What's the ice doing for it? What's it afraid of? Doing stream-of-consciousness writing like this usually leads to surprising answers.

At very least, it leads to more information. Is there a question that you shy away from answering? That's the tender spot that probably needs more probing. Like in shiatsu, acupuncture and trigger point therapy, the tender spots are where the energy is stored. By applying pressure or a needle to that spot, the energy block is released and energy flow is restored, with better health the result.

So if there's a tender spot, start probing it gently through talking, writing, pondering. Eventually, the attention you pay will act as warmth to melt the surrounding ice and reveal the secret within. That could be deep sense of unworthiness instilled somewhere in childhood. Or fear of losing love if one is successful. Or an old insult or criticism after what felt like a success, but was ruined for you.

Whatever it is, my guess is that there are tears to be shed. Hot tears that further melt the ice and free your energy to flow freely, bringing heat and breath to areas of your life you never imagined needing feeding.

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