Today, I was speaking with someone who has a voice inside her head that questions whether she'll ever find that "right fit" job. She also has a voice that compares herself negatively to other people.
These are the voices of fear. And they are lying to her.
She can choose to believe them and feel terrible, or to shut them off and feel better.
At a conference this weekend, a speaker suggested that when we feel fear, we instead say: "No, no, that's not fear - that's excitement!"
Fear is about wanting to return to the past, to the comfortable and familiar, to survival. It says "the future is unknown and therefore scary. I can't control it. So let me just stick with what I know."
Excitement is about looking forward to what is to come. It says "I wonder what's coming up? I'm curious and interested. I know it will be good!"
Looking forward feels so much better than looking back. Notice how your body feels when you're in fear or looking forward. How would you rather feel?
Focusing on your own path and what you can do feels way better than focusing on what other people do.
Comparing myself with other people usually makes me feel worse about myself.
Focusing on my own actions, abilities, contacts, possibilities - well, I just feel so much better and more powerful.
William James, the pioneering psychologist, said "The greatest discovery of this generation is that a human being can alter their life by altering their attitude."
I have so much experience with how changing my attitude both makes me feel better and produces better outcomes.
If you're feeling terrible about your job search, look at your attitude and how you talk to yourself. You DO have the power to change that, and that can make your job search so much more successful.
A FORGOTTEN GREAT PASSAGE FROM KEROUAC
2 hours ago